I heart you

Recently I noticed a new addition to the (sparsely decorated) wall above Leo and Pax's beds.  I asked Pax, "Who put that heart up on your wall?"
          "I did," he replied.  [using a ginormously sharp, oversized thumb tack]
"Um.... okay.  What made you decide to do that?"
          "Well, I put it up there because when I am feeling sad - like when I have to go to my room because I am in trouble - I can look at it and think about love."

Looking

We participated in our first 5K as a whole family this past weekend.  It was a wonderful community event for an exceptionally good cause - 100% of the proceeds from the race went directly to the day shelter that provides meals, showers, laundry facilities, job support, and more for the homeless population in the city.

Aidan and I jogged for most of the race, with Pax encouraging us from the stroller.  Leo and Jeff enjoyed a nice brisk walk together, and brisk it was - I had to break my "no running below 30 degrees" rule to participate in this event.  It was, in fact, below 20 at the start of the race, but we were not deterred - if anything, it made the race more poignant, knowing we had a warm, snug home to return to at the end.

The race was easy.  It was easy to pay the registration fee, to pick up the little goodies in our pre-race bag.  It was easy to gather with a few hundred others for the very friendly, informal "Go!" send off we got at the starting line.  It was an easy 3ish miles through some of the most beautiful parts of town.  At the end, we enjoyed homemade granola, healthy muffins, delicious fruit tarts, and bagels, all provided by the same volunteers who feed the homeless, day after day, at this shelter...

The hard part is more subtle.  The hard part is in the why.  The hard part is in unpacking with our children the complex and intricate details of why some people are homeless, and guiding them through understanding the inequalities of our wealthy nation.  The hard part is in how we teach our children to love and to accept all people with open hearts, full of compassion for humanity.  

I love this particular perspective:

"To be on mission is to have a heart full of compassion for people - to see them the way Jesus did... when we look - not glance, but look - we see the person, not the problem.  When we look at the person, we see that he or she matters to God and ought to matter to us.  When we look we see a person to be loved, not a problem to be handled.  Only when we look can we experience compassion."  (-Darrin Patrick)

The hard part is the Looking.

Kids in the Kitchen - Roundup

And now for an update on all we've been cooking up since my last post on the topic, including links to the recipes -

As it seems to happen again and again, when the kids cook, the food is the best it's ever been.  Aidan tried a new recipe for spaghetti and meatballs, and we're never going back to anything else. Thank you, Great -Grandma Turano!    I don't know which is better - the sauce or the meatballs.

Aidan also made Lettuce Hand Rolls, which we've dubbed "Asian Cocoons" instead.  This is *such* a simple, satisfying weeknight meal that is easily adapted to appeal to kids and adults alike.  We add jasmine rice and steamed edamame to round out the meal. The kids usually wrap their filling in tortillas; Jeff and I opt for crunchy lettuce instead.

A family favorite that Leo served up recently is Chicken Parmesan meatballs.

 Leo also made a scrumptious, from-scratch spaghetti sauce that was officially voted BEST EVER. As in ever EVER, in the History of All Spaghetti Sauces Ever Made.  We adapted it from this recipe - we (more than) halved it; we used ground turkey; we didn't simmer it for quite the full hour, since suddenly Master Chef Night turned into Master Arsenic Hour.  (My mother's phrase - arsenic hour - you don't know whether to give it or take it....)  Anyhoo.  The sauce was the perfect accompaniment to the pasta that we all used to "carb load" before the 5K race we're all doing in the morning, to benefit the local day shelter serving the homeless in our community.

Pax served up a delicious helping of Sloppy Toms (turkey meat instead of beef); sweet potato fries, and steamed broccoli with cheese sauce. The food was delicious - Pax is an excellent cook of simple meals - but the cheese sauce did not thicken as it should have...  The next night, I took the leftover cheese sauce and mixed it with about 8 ounces of cooked macaroni.  I added panko breadcrumbs, baked it for about half an hour at 350, and it yielded the most delicious, fuss-free, and kid-approved macaroni and cheese we've ever had. (There's no guarantee, of course, that I'll be able to replicate the UN-thick sauce required to make the mac n'cheese, but I'm still feeling proud of my ingenuity here.)

 Finally, Pax whipped up some mighty fine Molten Lava Cakes, a la Emeril Lagasse.  I really liked the process involved in making these cakes - you prep them well in advance, then freeze them before baking, then serve immediately - but they did not yield that highly satisfying mounded cake form that, when cut into, pours forth the molten lava.....rather, they collapsed onto the plate.

After reading about our adventures in the kitchen, my aunt recently sent us a recipe for a chocolate pudding cake that my grandmother (her mother) used to make. I cannot wait to make it with Pax!  Ever since Grandma Turano's meatballs, I've been more eager than ever to delve into recipes passed down from generations.  Was my grandmother a chef?  Hell no.  She was famous for her gorgeous table settings and flower arrangements, infamous for the dishes she served from the sideboard.  Along with setting a beautiful table, she was immaculate, fashionable, and chic.  But her culinary skills were quite another story.  Once, thinking she'd removed a portion of cake to serve for dessert, she unwrapped the parcel in front of her expectant guests, only to reveal... an angora sweater, kept in the freezer to prevent shedding.

And yet perhaps some of what I've learned about cooking, and what I'm hoping to teach to my own children, was, in fact, passed down from Jean Seehaver.  For in the moment when the lava cake collapsed, and the cheese sauce refused to thicken, I simply chuckled and announced, "Oh Well!" - a Jean Seehaver phrase, if ever there was one.

Wee Words, take 2

Pax was released from speech therapy just under a year ago, and has continued to make a lot of progress without the extra support of the specialist.  Still, though, he struggles with the S sound.

Recently, all the boys were at my parents' house while I was at the gym.  Leo and Pax were sitting at the counter, and Pax was telling Leo some story or another, with Grandma listening in.  Gently, my mom interrupted Pax at one point to say, "Pax, I couldn't really understand what you were saying just now, because you were not using your S sound."

Very calmly and evenly, Pax responded, "Dama, [Grandma], that is because I was not peaking to you.  I was peaking Ee-O. [Leo].  That is why you do not know what I am saying." (peaking = speaking, of course)

To which a very sheepish Grandma replied, "Oh."

**********
After a LONG morning of running errands, including an overly huge trip to the grocery store, I was hungry and a little bit crabby, ready to have lunch and get Pax down for a nap.  I said to him, "Pax, what is it you told me you wanted for lunch?"  He responded, "I want you to make me some swoppy joes and macaroni and cheese."

Exasperated, I said, "Pax, lunch is not something where I make you a bunch of different things.  Lunch is very straightforward."

He looked at me and cocked his head to the side.  "If lunch was straightbackward, then,...."

...and recited, in reverse, all the things we'd done that morning.

"We'd have to go back to the grocery store and put everything back on the shelf.  Then we would go to the place to mail things.  We would go home, and I would watch A LOT OF television. [cringe!!]  Then you would take me to Grandma and Grandpa's, and then we would have to go back home again."

He looked at me, triumphant.  I looked at him, astounded by his recall.

Straightbackward.

Wee Words

What I'm giggling about these days:

Pax and I were in the car, running errands and about to stop by Grandma and Grandpa's house to drop something off.  "Are Grandma and Grandpa here?" Pax asked as we pulled down the driveway.
"No, they are both at work."
"Oh.  Grandpa is golfing?" he asked.
"No, he is at work."  I replied.
"Yeah, that's what I said.  Golfing."
*****
On the way home from the grocery store, Pax was munching on the Kit Kat I bought him at the checkout.  With a deep sigh he said wistfully, and mostly to himself,
"I wish chocolate was helfy [healthy].  I would make it for DINNER."
*****
Every preschool day, I ask for a report about how he enjoyed his morning.  Answers are usually "Stupendous!" or, more often, "Awful."  Being put in time out or not getting to do show and tell (because of bad behavior) are the usual causes of Awful Days... (I'm still wondering how long it will take to make the connection that better behavior would yield more days deemed "stupendous" ...)  Anyhow, he still loves his teacher, even when she is a "meaniac" for putting him in time out.  Today, he made her a beautiful card before we left for school, and when she opened it, he told her, "That is a picture of me being naughty outside."

As if she needed reminding!

Map of my Heart

This morning, I happened upon a post from an art blogger I really like - she has a wealth and a depth of knowledge in art, and yet her methods and approaches are easily recreated by anyone.  I am not an artist; I know next to nothing about painting, composition, the difference between gouache and acrylic.  But I do know that I love to Create Things, and that creating things is important.  And so-- inspired,

The five of us sat down together to Create Things.  Our idea springboard was found here, and this is what we ended up with. (Clockwise, starting top left:  Anne; Aidan; Leo; Pax; Jeff)

A Map of My Heart:  

people and things that I love; pictures and words of what holds space in my heart.

I'm thinking I'll string these together on a pretty ribbon and hang them from the mantle, or perhaps mount them all together in an oversize frame.  And I love imagining this as a new tradition; I'd love to see how their hearts change, grow, expand in the years to come. Our work this morning was intentional, peaceful, quiet, contemplative, each of us absorbed in a common task.  And it was affirming, quietly yet powerfully affirming, to see such overlap in our hearts' maps.  

Happy Heart Day

Family Date = Ice skating at an almost-empty rink, followed by hot cocoa (for 3) and draft beers (for 2), followed by an impromptu snowball fight that had everyone in giggles, including the passersby, followed by a very scrumptious, authentic Chinese dinner at a new find in town, followed by a quiet evening of drinking wine, revising a paper, (Jeff) and remembering things (Anne).

Happy heart day.